This post is a guest post by John Hardin.

As is the case with most Christians in the world today, I was taught that the Rapture of the Saints was an event that would take place before the 7 year tribulation period, and the tribulation period would be the last 7 years before Christ returned to set up His Kingdom on Earth. Christ’s Kingdom on Earth is referred to as the Millennial Reign, or 1,000 year Reign of Christ. My problem with that scenario came about by some serious Bible study that began in the book of Exodus. I will relate that journey with you in this article, but for brevity’s sake, I will not bore you with an entire book….. yet.

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If you were to ask people what the problem is with the Church today, you would get varied responses.   If you asked the fundamentalists, they would site the lack of “standards”, modern music, lack of soul winning, and those evil baby baptizing devotees of John Calvin.  The Evangelicals, on the other hand would point the finger at those legalistic fundamentalists with their extra Biblical standards and high pressure soul winning.  Granted, there would be some on both sides that would condemn the shallow doctrine, easy believism (which pervades the modern Church), and feel good preaching.  While some of these are definite problems and others just silly distractions, I do not believe that they are the primary problem in the church.  Though it is true, that shallow preaching may produce shallow Christians, and legalistic or fluffy preaching may produce legalistic and fluffy Christians, that is not the biggest problem.

The biggest problem is you.  Okay, the biggest problem is us.  The fact of the matters is, three to four hours of church per week ought not make or break a person’s walk with Christ.  If I hear contemporary Christian music at church, followed by a speech from some guy with a plastic smile and a mullet, that doesn’t make me any more or less of Christian.  Likewise, if I go to Church and listen to hundred year old hymns (my preference) and then follow that with a sermon from a guy that looks and sounds more like Sergeant Carter than Joel Osteen, that does not add to or take away from my walk.  I am not saying that worship style is of no importance,  I am saying that my walk with Christ is personal, not corporate.  Corporate worship is important for a variety of reasons, not the least of which is that it is commanded.  I want you to understand that you can have a close walk with God regardless of what is around you.  Noah found Grace in the eyes of God when he was apparently one of the few righteous men left.  I know of several people who are not in what I would classify as a “good” Church, yet they love God with all their heart and desire to see people come to the knowledge of the truth.

So what is the problem?  I suppose a better question would be, what is the solution.  The problem as I see it is that of the myriad of professing Christians, very few are in the Word.   The simple truth is that if I am not in the Word consistently, and if I am not spending time communing with the God of Heaven, I will not grow no matter what type of Church I am in.  As I said earlier, Christianity is a personal walk with God.  Jonathan Edward grew up in a church that practiced the half way covenant and consequently was filled with lost church members, yet he as a young man would go sit by the river and think on divine things.  I suppose Peter said it best when he exhorted believer to desire the sincere milk of the Word.

I am aware that many will not apreciate this post.  Please understand, it is not my desire to tear away at the necesisty of Christ exalting worship and Bible based preaching.  Those are topics for another day.  What I am saying is that we need to stop pointing.  Let us agree with Isaiah who cried, ‘Woe is me”.

Many of you pastors are lamenting the fact that your numbers are lower than you like. In order to help you boost your numbers and earn a spot in your favorite Christian brag magazine, I have a compiled a helpful list.

1. Sing thirteen verses of Just As I Am during the alter call while snapping your fingers vigorously to prompt would be converts to come forward.

2. Count everyone that does come to the alter as a decision.

3. Say things like, “There are two reasons you should be in this alter, either because God spoke to you, or because He didn’t.

4. Turn the heat up to 90 and preach on Hell

5. Make young men who are not called into the ministry feel like lesser Christians. This allways gets a slew a guys “called to preach”.

6. Convince young ladies that they need to surrender to full time “Pastor wiving”.

7. Avoid those pesky expositional sermons. All they are good for is producing true Biblical converts, not always good for high numbers though .

8. Aim at young kids if you are shooting for record breaking conversions, they are easy to manipulate.

9. Try a different repeat a prayer. Your current repeat a prayer may have been recalled.

10. Knock on a lot of doors and count each person that answers as a decision. Every one that answers the door will make some kind of choice after all.

In case you may not have noticed, none of these are serious. Now, GO! GO! GO!

Proverbs 22:6 is a passage of Scripture that has been the topic of many discussions between friends and family. No doubt, many parents have beat themselves over this verse when the children that they tried to raise right go astray. In the same manner, countless Pastors have raked parents over the coals who have had children depart from the way. The problem with this is a terrible misunderstanding of the nature and design of the Proverbs, as well as an ignorance of the whole body of Scripture. It is important that we understand what a Proverb is. A Proverb is a trite statement expressing something that is generally true. Furthermore, the Proverbs are not promises and should not be taken as such. The truth is that when a child is trained in the right way, it is hoped, and generally is the case that the child follows the right way.

First of all, lets look at the author of the Proverb in question. It is generally accepted that Solomon is the author of the majority of the Proverbs and is of this one as well. There certainly is no argument as to whether or not Solomon departed from the way. Solomon’s father was David, the sweet psalmist of Israel, a man after God’s own heart. It is true that David sinned, but God continuously spoke of David as a man that walked in His precepts. Likewise, it was said of wicked kings that they did not follow the Lord as David did. It is a fair assumption that David trained his children in the way they should go, yet several of them departed from the way. The rebellion of Absalom and of Solomon in particular is not a reflection of David’s parenting

God is certainly the greatest example of a good father. He is indeed a perfect father. Anyone remember the book of Isaiah? In Chapter one, Jehovah is rebuking Israel for their backsliding. Look at the words of God in verse number two. “Hear, O heavens, and give ear, O earth: for the LORD hath spoken, I have nourished and brought up children, and they have rebelled against me.” Anyone with any understanding would acknowledge that Israel had departed from the way. Had God not reared them properly? Was God a bad parent? Certainly there could be no greater Father than Jehovah God, yet even the best of parents have children that rebel against their teaching.

What about the heroes of the Faith? To make it easy on everyone involved, we will give several Old Testament saints a batting average as it relates to their children that turned out right. We will give them a base hit for each child that turned out right and a strikeout for those that didn’t. Is that fair? I’m glad you agree. One would think that the great Patriarch Abraham would have a high batting average. Abraham gets a 500 hundred average for the children that the Bible says anything about. A 500 average certainly is respectable, but one would think that Abraham could do a bit better. Isaac also gets a .500. I hate to say it, but the lineup seems to get worse with Jacob not even able to bat .250. A .250 batting average is okay I suppose (unless your playing softball), but lets face it an average like that wont keep you in the Big Leagues for long. I could go on but we dare not belabor the point.

While we all hope for our children to walk in the right way, we can not blame ourselves if they do not walk in the path that we have trained them. Likewise, we dare not sit in judgment when others children go astray. We must determine to teach our children the truth and pray that God in His mercy would keep them in the right way. We can teach our kids, but we can not give them a pure heart. Whatever good becomes of our kids, we should give glory to God, and trust Him to bring the prodigals home. While this Proverb is not necessarily a promise, you and I can have confidence in the Gospel and lean on the fact that if God begins a good work in our children, He will perform it.

The subject of Santa Clause is a controversial one. There are many that claim Santa is a fat pagan troll, others say the he is of “Da Debil”. There are many who firmly believe in the jolly old elf, while others neither believe nor allow others to. Today I am going to tell you the truth about this matter of utmost importance. You have the blessed privilege of reading after the man that has all of the answers. So, buckle your seat belt and read carefully with an open mind, and we will get to the bottom of this mystery.

Lets begin by looking at the physics of Santa and his sleigh. In my extensive research I consulted snopes.com. If Santa were to deliver a gift to every Christian child that would give him about 91.8 million homes to deliver to. His round trip would be 75 and 1/2 million miles, that’s not counting the occasional trip to seven eleven for a hot dog and a bathroom break. I suppose Santa could take his bathroom breaks at houses, but the thought of a pagan troll using my toilet is disturbing. Santa would have to make 822.6 visits per second. To accomplish this, the magical sleigh would have to travel at a rate of 650 miles per second. That is obviously way beyond the sound barrier which means that Jolly Old Saint Nick would go through more reindeer than a Nascar driver does tires, since the reindeer would totally burst into flames. Please don’t tell Peta. We should also point out that Santa’s sleigh would weigh more than 300,000 tons.

After all of these startling facts that have just been pointed out, we can only come to one conclusion…
SANTA USES SUB-CONTRACTORS. I realize that this is an inflammatory accusation to make against the big guy, but it is the only logical conclusion. You should wait until your kids are of age to break this news to them.

I’m sure that we all have have our preferences when it comes to preaching styles.  Some prefer the preacher that is in a constant roar, these guys are often referred to as wind suckers.  There is also a group referred to as hackers.  Their sermons go something like, “I’m glada that Jesus saves sinersa.”  Perhaps you prefer the kind of preacher that is a silver tongued orator.  These guys could bring an audience to tears while describing the story of Humpty Dumpty.  Whatever your preference, it is a mistake to dismiss a guy simply on the grounds of style.  The wonderful thing about the gospel is that it’s efficacy does not rest in the individual speaker.  I remember hearing my pastor say on several occasions that the power of the gospel does not rest in the strength of ones voice.  My Pastor did not say this to defend his quiet voice, his voice measures on the Richter scale.  I have heard it said by many people that a certain preacher is a dead head all on the grounds that he is monotone or soft spoken.  I have also heard a preacher discredited for yelling everything from start to finish.  I hope that you will have confidence in a gospel that can soften the heart of the vilest sinner no matter who the preacher happens to be.

Paul decalred that the gospel is the power of God unto salvation.  The gospel then is all that is needed for a sinner to be called to salvation.  The gospel has the abiltiy to draw the sinner whether it be spoken, written, or sang.  The word of God is quick and powerfull no matter whether a windsucker gives it or that guy that just wants to chat with you.  Not by might nor by power but by my Spirit says the Lord.

It is a serious problem when the effectiveness of the gospel is thought to hinge on the individual.  To say that a speaker is dead or boring because he is not not loud and stimulating is to say the gospel is inefective when the speaker does not fit your particular taste.  The obvious conclusion that can be drawn from such rational is that the gospel is not powerful until the preacher makes it poweful.  It is also a mistake to didain a sermon because of the yelling preacher.  Does the gospel lose it’s power because the guys yelling annoys you or makes you uncomfortable?

I will close with a few verses since it is inevitable that some will still not understand that the gospel is effective no matter who is presenting it.  We simply have the wonferful oportunity of being ambassadors for Christ.

Isiah 55:11  So shall my word be that goeth forth out of my mouth: it shall not return unto me void, but it shall accomplish that which I please, and it shall prosper in the thing whereto I sent it.

In other words, every single time the gospel is presented it accomplishes God’s purpose, no matter how individuals respond

John 6:37  All that the Father giveth me shall come to me; and him that cometh to me I will in no wise cast out.

As you may have noticed I have not written a new post in a while.  I first want to thank all of my adoring fans for thier patience.  For those of you that are dying to know where I have been, I have a list prepared to inform you of my whereabouts.

1.  I have been away teaching a certain prominant fundamentalist the art of exposition

2.  I have been away teaching a certain prominant fundamentalist the meaning of exposition

3.  I have been away because my friend Joe Cassada is now blogging and he gives me an inferiority complex

4.  John Hardin told me that my blog site was actually fictitious

5.  I have spent alot of time planning my plot for world domination

6.  Dr Phill says that I dont need to blog in order to gain acceptance

7.  I have been to busy eating bon bons and watching old episodes of The A Team on Hulu

8.  Many theologians from the non reformed perspective have had a price on my head

9.  I have been studying the parable of the prodigal son for hidden codes that reveal the date of the Lord’s  return

10.  I have been writing a book on Baptist history revealing that Baptists actually date back to Abel.  All other denominations are the devil.

There can be no doubt, every one that is saved ought to be a witness.  I generally try to stay away from the phrase, “soul winner” because of the type of methodology that the term is associated with, and because it is not a biblical term.  A clear exegesis of the particular Proverb that declares the soul winner to be wise will show that he is speaking of making friends, not evangelizing.  Please do not take me wrong, anyone that is not interested in seeing sinners come to repentance and faith has probably never been there themselves.  It is vitally important, however, that we are gaining true converts and not making men “two fold children of  Hell” that have simply said a prayer, been dunked, memorized a creed, and adapted the accoutrement’s of the particular brand of religion that they happen to be a part of.

What causes men to use such fallacious methods of witnessing?  Certainly one problem is that some of these workers simply aren’t  saved.  If a man has never repented and submitted to the Lordship of Christ, it is doubtful that he will see the need that others do so.  Such individuals are often very hostile toward those that preach repentance, and go to great lengths to explain away the necessity of  repentance.  Some  have said that it simply means to change the mind.  The whole of scripture however declares a far different idea.  Christ repeatedly commanded men to take up the cross and follow him.  Christ also urged men to take His yoke upon them.  One will never take a yoke upon them without submitting first.

Another reason that such soft methods are employed is that men either misunderstand or mistrust the work of the Holy Ghost and the ability of God to draw the sinner.  Jesus declared that no one could come to Him except it were given Him of the Father.  Romans chapter five explains that there is none good nor any that seeks after God.  The sinner is completely depraved and will never seek God on his own.  Only the Spirit can convince men of sin and give them repentance and faith.   Those that misunderstand this or simply just do not believe it, will just see that the sinner gives a moral assent to certain truths and  lead the sinner in a shallow prayer.  Those that practice this dangerously shallow method usually say nothing of submitting to Christ’s Lordship, only that one must believe.  It should also be said that these same individuals go to great lengths to explain away First John so that they may justify the myriads of people that have made professions yet are unsaved.

The bottom line is that we can trust God to draw the sinner without any scheming on our part.  Jesus said that all the Father gave to Him would come to Him.  That being said, we do not have to reduce witnessing down to a sales pitch, nor do we have to manipulate people into saying a prayer.  I firmly believe that our God is well able to draw sinners unto Himself without any of our psychological ploys.  Let us declare the message faithfully and be sure that we are not facilitating the false profession of another.

In spite of what you may have heard, most everyone with the exception of a small minority, believe in the free will of man. Baptists, did not invent the notion of soul liberty. There are those who declare that certain theological camps don’t believe in free will. Those individuals usually know very little about the theological system that they are crying against. Even Calvin in his institutes admitted that man is endued with free will. If then, most everyone hold to some form of free will, what then is meant by free will. I am sure that there are others who have addressed this issue in a more clear fashion than I will, but I do hope to enlighten a few.

Though man has free will, it is very important to understand that his will is bound by his nature. The sinner’s will is bound by sin, and the saint’s by grace. The sinner, though he has free will can not will to be saved of himself. Many preachers make impassioned pleas for people to make decisions for Christ, but that sinner apart from the power of the Spirit is simply not able. Christ said in John 6:44 ” No man can come to me, except the Father which hath sent me draw him.” Scripture also declares in Romans 3:11, “There is none that understandeth, there is none that seeketh after God.” Jeremiah asked ” Can the Ethiopian change his skin, or the leopard his spots? It is clear from scripture that though a man is free, he can not possibly will that which is good. To use a natural example, you indeed have free will but you can not fly. Why cant you fly? Because your will is bound by your nature. If a sinner can not will himself saved or will to do that which is good, why the fuss over free will?

A person can only will to do that which is good after the Spirit of God has enlightened their soul and renewed their mind. Scripture is clear in Philippians’s 2:13, “For it is God which worketh in you both to will and to do of His good pleasure.” It is very important that we understand the bondage of man’s will. There are many people who have made a decision, signed a card, repeated a prayer, or got dunked who are strangers to spiritual life. These individuals curse as much as before their profession, their music tastes have not changed, nor have their filthy appetites. We can be assured that when a person is truly converted, He which hath begun good work shall perform it.

1. Finger nails dissolve in carpet.

2. The dishes will eventually wash themselves.

3. If we wash the dishes, our hands will fall off.

4. Dirty clothes pick themselves up.

5. Making your bed in the morning only ensures that it will get messed up again.

6. Kicking fallen ice across the kitchen floor makes it disappear.

7. A broom should have an on switch.

8. It is impossible to watch tv without holding the remote ( assuming your carnal enough to watch tv.)

9. People who die on tv are only acting.

10. You really can go to Wal-Mart and only purchase one item.

* This post obviously is not exhaustive. If you would like to add anything, please leave a comment.

P.S

Ladies, please don’t take this too seriously.